


Fall Out Of Formation

by kyeopen



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Band, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Parallel Universes, Parenthood, Parents, Supernatural Elements, joshler - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2019-09-22 11:27:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17058935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyeopen/pseuds/kyeopen
Summary: ‘Josh, you need to calm down, alright?’‘How can I fucking calm down Brendon, my husband is gone! My husband is gone, my son is nowhere to be seen and it’s like I’m not living in the same fucking house anymore!’‘Josh, you’ve never been married.’ Brendon eventually says after a few seconds. ‘You’ve never been married and you’ve been living on your own for three years.’





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, I got the idea from Awful AUs on Tumblr (http://awful-aus.tumblr.com/). The prompt was:
> 
> “I went to sleep last night in our bed after tucking in the kids, but when I wake up I’m alone in a studio apt rented in my name. My friends say I’m crazy and I’ve never been married, my parents say I’ve lived alone for years, and it seems when I try to find you that by all accounts you never existed. But I know you’re real. I still have the scar where you burnt me on the night we met.” AU

Today is a weird day, Josh thinks when he makes his way outside the music store he’s been working in for more than a year now. He has been feeling itchy the whole night and now that he’s wide awake, he can’t help but to feel a bit wary; paranoid, even. Something bad is going to happen. He can feel it. He doesn’t know when. He doesn’t how but something bad is going to happen. Or maybe it’s just him. That’s what his husband told him this morning when he shared his emotions.

‘You’re just overloaded’ he told him this morning. And maybe his husband is right, after all. It’s been weeks, months-even, since he hasn’t had a moment for himself. His boss needs him, the store needs him, and he’s happy to help. He is. He loves it there. As a kid, his only wish was to become a drummer in a successful and well-known band, but then he met Tyler in this cafe. And his plans changed. He isn’t quite the man he intended to be as a child, but he is okay with that. He really is. He still plays drums. And this music store is his safe place. He can give advice to people about music all day long, and he wouldn’t trade his life for anything in the world. Maybe it would seem as quite a normal and boring life for many people, but to him, it really isn’t.

December only just started and the store is more crowded than usual, meaning Josh won’t probably have a moment for himself until January. He’s tired, and he tries to convince himself that Tyler is right. He’s just overloaded. He just needs rest. A tiny bit of rest. And everything would go back to normal. This weird feeling will disappear. 

He walks down the street and makes his way towards the flat he shares with his husband and their newly adopted child. Noah. They adopted him six months ago and the first few weeks have been hard, because Noah is only 5 years old and he needed to get used to a completely different environment. But Josh likes to think that Tyler and him did a good job at making him feel safe. Noah is more talkative now than he ever was, and Josh is very happy about it.

He climbs the stairs and opens the door, slowly, knowing that his son is probably already fast asleep.

‘Honey, I’m home!’ He says, almost whispering.

‘Ah! Josh!’ Tyler says from the kitchen, a sleeping Noah in his arms. Josh can’t help but to smile at the sight and he quickly takes a few steps to join them, kissing Tyler on the cheeks.

‘How was your day?’ His husband asks. ‘You’re feeling better?’

‘Not really.’ Josh admits. ‘Well, I mean, a little bit, but it’s just… I just feel weird, Ty.’

‘You should try and get some sleep.’ Tyler advises him.

‘Yeah… You’re probably right. I’m exhausted.’ He answers. ‘How was your day anyway?’

Tyler is a teacher. The school he’s working at is just a ten minutes walk away from their flat and it’s also where Noah is registered. Josh knows students are often getting restless during this time of the year and he also knows that it tends to put a lot of pressure on his husband’s shoulders.

‘Fine.’ Tyler says after a few seconds. ‘I’m tired. But overall, it was a pretty good day. So there’s that.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah.’ He repeats. ‘I missed you at lunch, though.’

‘Yeah, sorry about that by the way. Brendon was sick. So I didn’t have any time to eat.’

‘Don’t feel bad, really.’ Tyler says with a smile, pecking him on the lips. ‘Alright, I’m going to put this little man to bed, and then we can watch a movie or something.’

‘Sounds good.’ Josh said, taking a seat around the kitchen table and getting ready to eat the leftovers.

A few minutes later, Tyler is back in the kitchen and wraps his arms around Josh’s shoulders, placing a kiss in the crook of his neck while his hands make their way underneath his jacket. Josh looks up at him with a smile and laughs at Tyler’s suggestive look.

‘What do you have in mind, Joseph?’ He asks, and Tyler lets out a small laugh at the nickname.

‘I think you know, Dun.’ He says, placing himself on Josh’s laps, pressing their lips together. ‘It’s just… With Noah and everything… I feel like we haven’t gotten any time for us.’ Tyler adds. ‘I miss you.’

‘I miss you too.’ Josh says, kissing him another time. And he does. So much. But then Tyler demands access to his mouth and he suddenly feels a rush of intense panic going through his body, causing him to get away from the kiss.

‘Hey.’ Tyler says, whispering. ‘What’s wrong, sweetie? You’re all tense.’

‘I… I don’t know, I… Same feeling as this morning.’ Josh only says, sighing. ‘I guess I’m just stressed with the music store and all… I often get paranoid when I’m pushing myself too much.’

‘You should sleep, man.’ Tyler eventually says, placing his two hands on the back of his neck. ‘You look exhausted. I hate seeing you like this.’

‘I’m gonna be okay.’

‘I know.’ Tyler answers. ‘But still. Can’t you ask for a few days off? Please? You need rest. You’ve been working so hard for the past few weeks, I’m sure your boss can understand that.’

‘Yeah.’ Josh gives in. ‘You’re probably right.’ He says with a smile. ‘I’ll ask tomorrow.’

‘Great.’

‘I’m sorry for ruining our moment.’ Josh says and Tyler only lets out a small laugh.

‘We can have some great sex some other times. Don’t worry about it.’ Tyler tells him. ‘Alright, forget about the movie and go to bed.’

‘I’ll be right there.’ He says with a smile, making his way in Noah’s bedroom first. This one is asleep, surrounded by his stuffed animals and Josh tries to be as discreet as he can be but soon, his son slowly opens his eyes and a huge smile appears on his face when his eyes fall on Josh.

‘Dad!’ He exclaims, with a sleepy voice.

‘Hey, sweetheart.’ He says, looking down at him with a smile. ‘How was school?’

‘Great!’ Noah answers. ‘I know how to write my name. Do you want to see?’

‘You have to show me tomorrow!’

‘Okay.’

‘Alright, Noah. Go back to sleep, alright?’ Josh asks, kissing him on the cheek.

‘Can I have my goodnight hug?’

‘Of course.’ He says, leaning towards him, and he can’t help but to smile when Noah wraps his arms around his neck to bring him closer.

‘Goodnight pumpkin.’

‘Goodnight, dad.’

Josh waits for his son to close his eyes and carefully places his favorite stuffed animal next to him. He then gets up and makes sure that the nightlight is still on before closing the door and making his way in his bedroom. Tyler is already seated down on their bed, with his legs beneath the duvet. This one seems to be deeply concentrated on a book he’s reading and it’s only when Josh joins him under the covers that this one looks up at him.

‘Noah wasn’t asleep?’

‘No, I think I woke him up when I opened the door.’ Josh answers. ‘He told me he learned to write his own name. That’s sick.’ Josh adds with a smile.

‘He did. He showed me when we went back home in the afternoon.’ Tyler stops for a while and speaks again a few seconds later. ‘You know… I honestly thought it would be harder than that. I just… He seems like he’s doing very well, right?’

‘He is.’ Josh answers, placing one of his hands on the back of Tyler’s neck to press their lips together. ‘You’re a great father.’

‘You are, too.’

‘Yeah.’ Josh says, unsure.

‘You are.’ Tyler repeats, looking at him in the eye.

‘I just… Sometimes I feel like you did all the hard work and I… I don’t know. It seems like he… Like he feels safer around you?’

‘You know that’s not true, Josh.’

‘It kinda is, though. You’re a lot more closer. The two of you. I just… I’m missing all the fun with this job.’ He says. ‘I love it there, but I just wish I could have more alone time with him.

‘Josh, he loves you, alright?’ Tyler assures him while running one of his hands through Josh’s black hair. ‘He’s always asking for you. Trust me.’

‘I was thinking… Maybe I could take a sabbatical? From work, I mean. I talked to my boss and he said it was possible. For five months. Maybe six. I just want to be there for Noah. More than I already am, I mean. What do you think about it?’

‘I think it’s a great idea.’ Tyler instantly answers with a smile. ‘If that’s something you want Josh, then go for it.’

‘I wouldn’t be paid, though.’ Josh clarifies. ‘My boss told me I could also work part-time to have some kind of revenue.’

‘We can manage, J.’ Tyler says. ‘I think it could be good for you.’

‘I’m not sure yet, but… Yeah. I think I’d like that.’

‘Then take time to think about it. You don’t have to rush into it if you’re not sure. It’s a big decision. But just know I’ll support you no matter what you decide.’

‘Thanks.’ Josh says, after a while. ‘I love you.’

‘Love you too.’ Tyler answers, wrapping his arm around Josh’s waist. ‘So much.’ He adds. ‘Now, get some sleep, alright?’

Josh only nods, and closes his eyes, falling asleep almost instantly.

 

 

Josh wakes up with a start the next morning, and the same feeling hits him. Something bad is going to happen. He doesn’t hear the snores of his sleeping husband, and doesn’t feel his presence next to him either. But he doesn’t think anything of it, at first. After all, his husband has always been a light sleeper and Josh is still feeling exhausted from the amount of working hours he did this week. He's just stressed. He slowly opens his eyes and makes sure that he’s not late for his work but his alarm clock still hasn’t gone off, and he lets out a sigh of relief when he realizes he still has two hours to get ready.

He turns around and frowns when he notices that Tyler’s side of the bed is empty. It’s a Saturday and he knows his husband likes to stay in bed until late to recover from the long week at school. He is usually the one taking care of Noah until he has to leave for work. But it’s not the first time that insomnia bother Tyler’s sleep and so Josh shrugs his shoulders and gets up to make his way towards the bathroom. There, he takes a quick shower and it’s only when he takes a few steps in the kitchen that he’s surprised not to see Tyler seated down on the sofa with Noah. These two usually always watch cartoons in the morning but today, the television is off. And his husband and his son are nowhere to be seen.

‘Tyler?’ Josh bits his lower lip and goes back to his bedroom; still empty.

‘Noah?’ Still nothing. His heart starts beating faster against his chest and he tries to convince himself that his husband just went out with his son to do some groceries shopping but there are no notes on the kitchen table and Tyler wouldn’t leave with Noah without writing a few words to warn Josh first.

He then decides to check his son’s room and what he sees inside makes his heart skips a beat. The bedroom is empty. His stuffed animals and his toys are nowhere to be seen, and the children’s bed has been replaced by an exercise bike.

‘What the fuck’ Josh says, almost whispering before rushing towards the drawers. But there again, Noah’s clothes have been replaced by several pens, a few batteries, and some keys. ‘Oh god, oh god, oh god. What the fuck is going on?’ He says again to himself, leaving the room.

He comes back in the living-room and runs a hand through his hair a few times, trying to reason himself. This must be a joke. That’s it. It’s just another one of Tyler’s bad jokes.

‘Tyler, please, just stop fucking with me, alright? It’s not funny.’ He waits for a few seconds but quickly gets up once again and tries to take deep breaths to calm himself. He can feel his heart beating hard against his chest and he stays there, immobile, in the middle of the kitchen, with a lump in his throat, unable to take any initiatives. His lips are shaking and some tears are already rolling down his cheeks but he quickly wipes them with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

‘It’s a dream.’ Josh says after a few seconds. ‘It’s just a fucking dream.’ He repeats, slapping himself on the left cheek. ‘Please, wake up. God Josh, just fucking wake up.’ He pinches his arm as hard as he can. ‘Tyler, please, I swear to god if it’s another one of your jokes, I’m going to fucking kill you.’

He rushes inside his bedroom to take his cellphone. He flips through his contacts to find Tyler’s number but his hands start shaking when he gets to the end of his contacts. There’s no number saved as Tyler in his phone. He drops his phone on the ground and suddenly bursts into tears. Because Tyler’s clothes are gone too and Josh doesn’t remember how to breathe anymore. He’s sweating and he knows he’s on the verge of a panic attack. He tries to do the breathing exercises Tyler has taught him but nothing is working.

He takes his cellphone another time with a shaking hand and starts dialing Tyler’s phone number.

‘ _We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again.’_

‘Oh my god, what the fuck?’ Josh yells and cries harder, dialing the number another time.

‘ _We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again.’_

‘This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening. Please. Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up.’

He goes through his contacts another time and tries to ignore how his heart skips a beat every single time his eyes fall on a name he has never heard of. He considers calling his mom first but he remembers a few seconds later that this one broke her phone a few days ago and is then unreachable. He bits his lower lip and lets out a sigh of relief when the name of ‘Brendon’ pops up on his screen. _Brendon_. His best-friend. If he can’t help him, then no one can.

‘What’s up, my man?’

‘Brendon, oh my god, have you seen him? Have you seen Tyler? Have you seen Noah? They’re gone, Brendon, they’re fucking gone, I don’t know… I don’t know where they are, and… All their stuff are gone, please, you have to help me, Bren, I’m… I’m freaking the fuck out, I-’

‘Josh, what the fuck are you talking about?’ Brendon cuts him off. ‘Who is Tyler?’

Josh feels like his whole world is crashing down right in front of him.

‘Brendon, don’t fuck with me, alright? This is fucking serious, they’re both _gone_. Tyler and Noah are gone! I just… Please tell me you’ve seen them.’

‘Are you high?’ Brendon asks. ‘Cause if you are, you have to tell me what you tried cause it seems fucking mental!’

‘Brendon!’ Josh suddenly yells, loosing patience. ‘This is not a joke! I woke up and everything was gone. Everything! I tried to call him two times but I- I don’t… I don’t know how… I-’

‘Josh, you need to calm down, alright?’

‘How can I fucking calm down Brendon, my husband is gone! My husband is gone, my son is nowhere to be seen and it’s like I’m not living in the same fucking house anymore!’

‘Josh, you’ve never been married.’ His best-friend eventually says after a few seconds. ‘You’ve never been married and you’ve been living on your own for three years.’

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so. I'm really really fucking nervous and insecure about this fic. I'm not used to write this kind of things so it's just a huge challenge for me. 
> 
> It's been a month since I'm thinking about writing this fic and I initially wanted to wait a little bit before posting the first chapter but I guess I'm excited to have your opinions so here it is. Also, I'm currently very very busy with uni/exams and life in general, so don't expect regular updates!
> 
> Hope you liked it!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait

_Josh, you’ve never been married. You’ve never been married and you’ve been living on your own for three years_

 

At this point, Josh is suffocating. He tries to convince himself that Brendon is only messing with him once again. Because that’s what he always does. Mess with him. But his best-friend seems so serious that Josh just knows, deep down, that he is just as confused as him. He lets out a nervous laugh and places one of his hands over his eyes, trying to contain himself.

‘What the fuck are you saying?’ He asks with such a fragile voice. ‘What the fuck are you saying?’ He repeats another time.

‘You’ve never been married.’ Brendon only repeats a second time. ‘You’re single. And you certainly don’t have any child. At least, not that I know of.’ He says. ‘Now can you stop joking? It’s only 9am, I’m tired, I don’t have time for your nonsense.’

‘No please!’ Josh instantly adds. ‘Please, Brendon, I’m not joking. I’m not joking, I’m not-’ But he can’t finish his sentence that he’s bursting into tears once again. He wants to beg his friend to stay on the phone but he becomes so choked up that no words seem to manage to come out of his mouth.

‘Dude, breathe, alright? Breathe. It’s gonna be okay. You’re just being delusional.'

‘For fuck’s sake Brendon, I’m not being delusional!’ Josh suddenly yells, making his way to the living-room. ‘I’m not delusional! I was… I was working all day long yesterday, alright? And I… Fuck, I knew something bad would happen, I had this feeling. I was so fucking wary and I just- I _knew._ Something was off. Something was off but I didn’t know what to do about it. Then I came back home. I came back home and I told Tyler about it and then I just... I thought maybe I was just tired from work and I… I don’t know, we just adopted Noah and we’re both so stressed and exhausted so I just brushed it off and ignored it. I gave Noah his goodnight hug and I went to sleep. I-’

‘Josh you’re not making any sense.’ Brendon only says, cutting him off. ‘Everything you say… It doesn’t make any sense.’

‘And then I _woke up_.’ Josh continues, ignoring his friend. ‘I woke up in here and I don’t know what the fuck happened but _this_ , Brendon? It’s not my flat. It looks like it… God, it looks like a perfect copy of it but it’s not my fucking flat, alright? They’re both _gone_. My husband is gone, god, I...’

Suddenly, Josh feels dizzy, his head is hurting and he takes a seat on the couch so he can control his breathing better.

‘Brendon, I’m gonna… I’m gonna faint, I- I don’t feel well.’

‘Alright dude, just… Breathe, okay? I’m coming over. Try to relax. I don’t know what the fuck is happening to you but I’m on my way, alright? I’ll be there in five minutes.’

‘Alright. Please, hurry.’

Josh is so breathless he feels like he just ran a marathon. He’s sweating and he can’t think of something else than the fact that his own husband and child have been taken away from him. He doesn’t know where they are. He doesn’t know where they are and his mind keeps playing the day before in his head, to try to think of something – anything- that could explain what’s happening to him right now. His heart is still beating so hard against his chest and Josh is pretty sure he’s on the verge of a heart arrest.

He closes his eyes and tries to picture his husband in his head. He pictures his smile, his eyes, his nose, his stupid dance moves and a ghost of a smile almost appears on his face. He tries to picture him next to him, helping him overcome another one of his anxiety attacks. A few minutes later, he can feel his heartbeats slow down a little bit and he decides to stand up, slowly. He stands up and looks around him carefully. He wants to look for something, a detail, a sign that could help him figure everything out. But what he sees only make him even more lightheaded. His curtains aren’t blue anymore. They’re black. The TV is much bigger than the day before and he’s pretty sure the disposition of the couches and the stools isn’t exactly the same.

He knows that for a fact because Tyler might be the most fastidious person he ever met. He has been living with him for one year and a half and he has annoyed him so much about the housework that he just _knows_ that the couch is 9 or 11 inches away from its usual place.

All these tiny details makes him loose his breath again and he instantly jumps of the sofa when he hears a few knocks on his door. He hurries to the front door and opens it, only to face his very confused best-friend.

‘Dude what happened to your hair?’ Is the first thing Brendon asks.

‘My hair? What happened to my hair?’ Josh says, turning around to face the mirror.

‘It’s fucking black!’

‘Yeah, I’m aware of that, Brendon.’ Josh adds, sarcastically. ‘Now can we please talk ab-’

‘Why the hell is your hair black?’ His best-friend just asks again. ‘It was blue just two days ago.’

‘No, it wasn’t.’ Josh only says, loosing his patience. ‘It was black.’

‘It was _blue_. Dude. Are you loosing your mind or something?’

‘I’m not loosing my fuckin-’

‘Okay okay, whatever.’ Brendon finally says. ‘So? What’s the deal?’

‘What’s the deal?’ Josh repeats with a loud voice, nearly yelling. ‘I told you what the deal was! My husband is gone.’

‘Josh, you don’t have a-’

‘Don’t you dare say I’m not married again. Please. Cause I fucking _am_.’

Brendon seems to take a few seconds to process what Josh has just told him, looking at him dead in the eye. But Josh is not blinking. He doesn’t look away and Brendon eventually lets out a small sigh and lets himself fall on the couch, scratching his head.

‘I don’t know dude.’ He says after a while. ‘What do you want me to say?’

‘I want you to say that I’m right about everything and that I’m not loosing my fucking mind.’

‘Josh, I just don’t understand what’s going on with you. We’ve been best-friends for over a decade, don’t you think I’d know if you were married? And to a _man_ above everything else?’

‘So what now you’re homophobic or something?’

‘Dude, I’m _bisexual._ You, on the other hand, are the straightest man I’ve ever met.’

‘I’m gay.’

‘No, you’re not.’

‘Brendon, I’m pretty sure I’m gay, alright?’

‘So, you’ve been fucking a guy called Tyler without telling me. Is this a weird way for you to come out to me?’

‘For christ’s sake, Bren, of course we fucked, we’re _married_. And don’t act like you don’t know I’m gay, you’re the first person I came out to in high-school.’

‘You really believe everything you say, don’t you?’ Brendon eventually says with a confused expression. ‘Cause I swear to god, Josh, if this is another one of your stupid jok-’

‘It’s not a joke.’ Josh instantly answers. ‘Please. You’ve got to help me on this.’

Brendon doesn't seem convinced but eventually gives in. ‘Alright.’

His best-friend sits straight on the couch and runs one of his hands through his hair. They both stay silent for a few minutes and Josh suddenly realizes his own best-friend probably doesn’t believe him and doesn’t seem to have the slightest idea of what’s going on.

‘You really think I’m crazy, don’t you?’ He asks.

‘I don’t know man, I… I’m so confused. It’s like you reinvented your whole life over the night. It doesn’t make any sense to me but… You’re clearly freaking out. And you’re not drunk. You’re not high. So something is clearly going on, we just have to figure it out.’

‘So you’re going to help me?’

‘Of course I’m going to help you dude. I don’t know how yet but we’ll find something.’

‘I just… I can’t think clearly, Bren. My head is all over the place.’

‘Okay then let me get this straight. You’re married?’

‘I am.’

‘To a guy called Tyler? And you have a son. Noah. You adopted him.’

‘We did. Six months ago. His room is over there.’ Josh says, pointing at door. ‘Well… At least, it used to be. Now there is an exercise bike for some reasons.’

‘Are you sure you didn’t dream the whole thing?’

‘Positive.’ Josh says. ‘I can’t… I can’t have dreamed that Brendon. I can’t have dreamed the last three years of my life. It can’t be possible.’

‘But maybe it is? I mean, I… I can’t think of anything else.’

‘Alright, hear me out. My husband is called Tyler Joseph. I met him in a cafe three years ago. I was a barista at that time and he was just ordering some coffee. He was adorable and he kept coming back so I eventually got to know him and after a while I just decided to ask him out. He said yes. We started dating and we decided to move in together one year and a half ago. We got married last year in June, the 27th. We decided to adopt before getting married. We got lucky, it only took one year to complete the procedure and we brought him home six months ago. The first few months were hard as fuck cause he had to get used to a completely different environment but we eventually made it work. I like to think that he feels safe now. Thanks to us. Especially Tyler, he’s the one who spent most of his time with him cause I’m too busy with my job. He’s called Noah. He’s 5. He’s a great kid. And you’re the godfather.’

‘I am?’

‘You are. You’re always spoiling him so much so I just don’t understand how the fuck you don’t remember him.’

‘I just… I’m sorry, man. I just… This isn’t the Josh I know.’

‘Right.’ Josh says. ‘There’s no way it’s a dream, dude. I wouldn’t have remembered so many details otherwise.’

‘Yeah.’ Brendon admits. ‘I guess that makes sense. You even remember the date of your own wedding, so…’

‘Fuck.’

‘What?’ His friend asks, looking up at him.

‘My wedding!’ Josh exclaims with a loud voice. ‘Brendon you’re a genius.’ He adds, looking down at his hand. His wedding ring is still here, on the fourth finger of his left hand. ‘How do you explain this, then?’

‘This is your wedding ring?’ 

Josh only nods. He usually never takes it off but this time he removes it and gives it to his best-friend to make him understand that he’s _right_ , that he’s not _crazy_. Brendon frowns and takes it carefully before inspecting it.

‘J + T.’ He reads, squinting his eyes. ‘Dudes for life?’

‘Yeah, it’s… It’s a thing between us.’

‘You’re such a sap.’

‘Whatever.’ Josh answers with the ghost of a smile. ‘That proves something right? I’m not crazy.’

‘I guess.’ His best-friend agrees, still looking at the ring. ‘This is some weird shit, dude.’

Josh only nods and looks down at his knees for a few seconds, closing his eyes.

‘Wait, why did you say you _used_ to work as a barista?’

‘Because it’s true?’

‘But where are you working now?’

‘Bren, you’re working with me.’

‘I don’t.’

‘Dude, we’re both working in the music store.’

‘ _I_ am working in the music store. You’re still working in this cafe.’

‘Okay I’m freaking out.’ Josh admits, feeling his heartbeats speeding up against his chest. ‘This is my life we’re talking about. My whole life has changed. I just… I need to go back where I come from. I need to come back to Tyler. And Noah. I can’t leave them alone in… Wherever they are. I can’t leave them alone. They need me. And fuck, I need them.’

‘Hey dude.’ Brendon squats down next to him and takes his two hands in his. ‘We’re going to find them, alright? We’re going to figure this out. I promise.’

‘Okay.’ Josh says, still unsure. ‘This must be a plot or something. A plot against me or some conspiracy shit, I don’t know.’

‘Dude, no one’s plotting against you, alright? Maybe it’s something supernatural?’

‘Brendon, come on, you can’t be serious right now.’

‘Josh, just think about it, alright? How can you explain everything? You woke up in a flat that you don’t recognize, with a life you don’t know anything of. Your hair is black and I can promise you that it was blue just two days ago. Look, I have pictures.’ He tells him, handing him his phone to show him a picture of the two of them, laughing.

‘This picture was taken two days ago?’

‘It was.’

‘You’re not fucking with me, right?’

‘For god’s sake no, Josh, I’m not fucking with you. Look at the date!’

Brendon points at the screen of his phone and Josh only sighs, running his two hands through his hair. The date of two days ago is written, and he knows for a fact his best-friend wouldn’t go that far to fool him.

‘It can’t be supernatural...’ Josh says, but he doesn’t know if he tries to convince Brendon or himself. ‘I mean, this kind of things… It doesn’t exist.’

‘Dude, you’re the one who keeps telling me that aliens are out there!’

‘Yeah but… It’s not the same, Brendon. What if it’s just memory loss? What if I’m just mad?’ And the knot in his stomach only gets tighter just thinking about this possibility.

‘You told me yourself. You wouldn’t know so many details about a completely different life. You have this ring, Josh. Trust me, I know how crazy it sounds but dude… You sounded so shaken up when you called me. It’s real. Alright?’

‘Alright.’ Josh says, almost whispering. ‘Alright. What do you think it is, then? Did someone alter all my memories or something?’

‘Dude. _Again,_ no one is plotting against you. You’re the sweetest person I know, I don’t see why someone would want to make you suffer like that.’

‘Parallel Universes, then?’

‘It could be.’

‘But then how the fuck did I end up in your world? Because I certainly didn’t ask for any of this.’

‘We’re going to do some research. We’re going to do some research and we’re going to figure this out, alright?’

‘And in the meantime?’

‘In the meantime, I… I guess you just have to adjust to this life, to this version of yourself.’

‘How do I do this?’

‘Well I guess I’ll tell you everything I know about my best-friend.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go. Did you like it? 
> 
> Also, I don't really know how to continue this fic. I mean I do but I have two possibilities so would you be interested to see what's going on in the parallel universe (With Tyler & Noah) or would you prefer that I stick to this one?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it took so long. A huge thanks to my friend Olga for helping me with this story.

_18 hours earlier in the same universe_

 

‘ _Previously on Vikings’_

Josh is seated comfortably on his couch, his eyes staring at the television’s screen in front of him. He has been waiting for more than six months to watch the new season of his favorite show and he can feel the excitement bubbling up in him. That, until he jumps with surprise when his phone starts ringing against the small wood table in front of him. He usually always puts his phone on silent mode but he has been waiting for an important phone call from his boss and the last thing he wants is to miss it.

But once again, the call doesn’t come from his boss, but from his mom. He considers ignoring it and starting the episode that has been waiting for him all day long but still decides against it after a few seconds. He knows his mom, and this one will probably try to call him again a few times before giving up and realizing the reason her son doesn’t answer is because he might be busy.

‘Hi mom, what’s up?’

‘Hey sweetheart, how are you doing?’

‘Same old same old, you know. Just enjoying my day off. What about you?’

‘We’re in your grandfather house with your dad and Jordan. We’re trying to put everything into order before starting to fill the boxes… Would you mind joining us to give us a hand?

His grandfather, William, has passed away a few months ago and his parents had decided to sell the house a few weeks ago without talking about it to Josh first. He’s still a bit angry at them about it although he understands their choices. Taking care of a huge house like this represents a lot of work and money and Josh perfectly knows no-one in his family will have the courage nor will be willing to spend a crazy amount of time to do that, not even himself. It’s just a bit weird to him, having to say goodbye to a house he spent so much time in as a child. Also, selling this house would mean drawing a line under his grandfather’s death and he’s not sure he’s ready to do that just yet. He and his siblings have always been close to him and saying goodbye to him during the funeral is one of the hardest things Josh ever had to do.

‘Josh? You’re still there?’ His mom asks again.

‘Yeah yeah I’m still here… Of course I’ll give you a hand. I’ll be there in about an hour.’

His grandfather’s house is only a fifteen minutes ride from his apartment, thirty minutes if there is traffic., which there almost always is. Josh sighs for a few seconds and turns off the TV before making his way to his bedroom. He still isn’t dressed and so he quickly takes the first clothes that his hand can reach, that being an old tee-shirt he stole from his dad, a tracksuit and a black hoodie.

He soon finds himself in his car and is relieved to see that for the first time in this week, the main road is not that crowded and he can easily drive away from the city center to join the little village in which his grandfather used to live. Twenty minutes later, when he parks the car on the driveway that leads to the house, his father is already outside and walking towards him.

‘Hey, thanks for helping us out with it. God knows how much we need it.’

‘Yeah I bet you do. It’s nice to see you dad.’ Josh says, taking his father in his arms.

When Josh first steps in the house, he’s happy to see that his parents haven’t really started packing his grandfather’s stuff yet and that the main room still looks exactly like in his souvenirs. His grandfather was a bit weird, and very obsessed with everything related to witchcraft. Josh has always been used to it but when his eyes fall on the different furniture items, he knows that from a stranger’s eyes, this house must seem very odd, a bit creepy even. His grandfather used to collect all kind of weird objects and old books, and his house has always been kind of a mess. Josh liked it though, and he loved his granddad a bit more.

He hugs his mother and his brother and talks to them for a few minutes, catching up. He then wanders around the different rooms until he walks in this old attic he wasn’t allowed to go in when he was a kid. There is no one to stop him from doing that now and Josh sits down on a small tool in the left corner of the room. He looks around and even though he’s already been there a few times, he is still amazed and overwhelmed by the countless books surrounding him. There’s so much dust, too, that he’s afraid he might choke. He starts piling the books in a box he brought from downstairs but there are so many of them Josh is pretty sure he would need a hundred boxes to clear out the room.

‘Everything’s okay up there?’ His mother asks.

‘Yeah, it’s just… A lot of books.’

‘You can keep some of them if you want.’

Josh simply agrees with a nod of his head when an old book catches his attention. It’s so old the title is fading, the back of the book is spoiled and some of the pages are even ripped. It seems like this book has been through a lot and so Josh takes it in his hands very carefully, making sure he’s not damaging it a bit more than it already is. He holds it for a few seconds and frowns at how light it actually is. This book must be at least a thousand pages long yet he still feels to him like he’s holding a feather. He shrugs his shoulders and he’s about to put it aside but curiosity gets the best of him and he eventually opens it at a random page, smiling when his eyes fall on the text written in italics. Spells. It’s a book of spells and Josh almost wants to make fun of his grandpa for having this book in his possession but he’s actually not very surprised. He browses it for a while until his eyes fall on two words that catches his attention. _Parallel Universes_. There is a spell written next to it. It’s only two or three sentences long and Josh can’t quite recognize the language but he is pretty sure this must be latin or greek.

‘Mundus ego volo esse, fac me stare ibi. Tempus ego praecipio et loco ego praecipio! Mutatio me non nunc! Hoc est mea voluntas, ut mote sit!’ Josh says with careful eyes, stuttering on certain words. He goes on looking at some of the drawings on the same page and lets out a small laugh.

‘This is some heavy bullshit grandpa.’ He says, dropping the book in the box, and repeating the same gesture for every other item around him. He goes on filling boxes for a few hours until he feels like his back can’t take it anymore and eventually comes back downstairs to join his parents and his brother in the garden. Besides being a bit obsessed by supernatural stuff, his grandfather was also a huge nature lover and that’s why he also used to own a huge terrain around his house. Josh stays there, drinking a couple of beers and catching up with his family until he decides he’s had enough and drives back home, a bit tipsy for how empty his stomach is.

Once inside his apartment, Josh only has the courage to watch a couple of episodes of Vikings. He feels exhausted and when his body fall on his mattress, he’s surprised to see that he had enough strength to make it through the day without taking a nap at some point. He falls asleep within a second.

The next morning, Josh wakes up with a start. A weird feeling settles in his stomach and Josh can’t quite put a name on it. _Fear_. That’s the first word that crosses his mind. He’s afraid. No. He’s terrified. Something changed. He can feel that the atmosphere in his room is completely different and he feels stuck. Paralyzed, even. He’s afraid to do the slightest movement. He’s even afraid to breathe. If he does, he’s afraid something terrible might happen.

He tries to slow down his heart-rate and slowly opens his eyes, trying not to make any noise. He looks to his left and takes a deep breathe when he sees that he’s still in his own room. At home. But that’s when he hears something. Something else. A sigh. And his heart starts pounding hard against his chest when he realizes the sigh doesn’t come from himself. There’s somebody else in his room and Josh is afraid he might has a heart attack. For a few seconds, he’s wondering if he should do something. Get up and turn on the light or pretend to sleep. For all he knows, this stranger might be dangerous, maybe even armed.

‘Hey babe, you’re awake?’ The stranger says while placing his right hand on Josh’s cheek.

‘Who the fuck are you?’ Josh instantly yells and this time, his body seems to take the decision on its own and he jumps of his bed and turns on the light as fast as he can.

‘Wow man, take it easy on me, you know my brain can’t function properly in the morning, I need my coff- Josh, what the fuck did you do to your hair?’ The stranger asks with a smile and Josh is pretty sure he’s going to die. His heart is beating so hard against his chest he’s afraid it might explode. He’s sweating, his whole body is shaking and Josh has never been so scared in his entire life. There’s a stranger in his room. In his own bed. And from what it looks like, this one has been sleeping next to him the whole night.

‘M-My hair?’ He still asks, his voice shaking.

‘Yeah your hair, dummy. Why is it blue?’

‘I-I, it’s…. It’s always been b-blue.’

The stranger looks at him with a confused expression and lets out a small laugh, sitting straight on the bed. Josh opens his eyes wide when he realizes that this one is shirtless. He’s shirtless and only wears a boxer short and he’s seating on his _own_ bed.

‘Oh god.’ Josh only says. ‘Oh god, oh god, what’s happening to me?’ He runs his two hands through his hair a few times and closes his eyes for a while, praying that everything goes back to normal once he opens them again. It’s all a dream. He says silently to himself. You’re dreaming, you’re only dreaming.

At this point, Josh is huddled up in the corner of his room and he tries so hard to get his respiration back under control but nothing seems to be working. He tries to do the breathing techniques his mom has taught him when he was a kid but he’s still hyperventilating and Josh just knows that he’s on the verge of a panic attack.

‘Hey Josh?’ The stranger speaks again with such a soothing voice Josh is afraid he might be going crazy. This one doesn’t even seem to be dangerous. He seems completely harmless and it makes the whole situation even more terrifying. ‘What’s wrong, sweetheart?’

‘Don’t touch me!’ Josh says, even louder than before. ‘Don’t fucking touch me.’ He repeats a second time when the stranger takes a few steps towards him. ‘Get the fuck out of my apartment or I swear to god I’m calling the police.’

‘Josh?’ The stranger says, confused. ‘Josh, hey it’s me, alright? It’s only me. You’re safe here, okay? No one is going to hurt you.’

‘What the fuck are you talking about man I.. I don’t even know you, who the fuck are you?’

‘Josh, it’s me.’ The stranger says again. ‘Tyler? Your husband?’

‘But I’m not fucking married!’

‘Sorry to break it to you, but you are.’ this Tyler guy says, and Josh bites his lower lip when he realizes this one seems just as confused as him. ‘Josh I don’t know what’s going on with you but if this is a joke, it’s really not funny, alright? You’re going to wake up Noah.’

‘Who the fuck is Noah?’ Josh yells.

‘He’s your fucking son, dickhead.’ Tyler answers, louder, and Josh jumps with surprise by how angry this one suddenly looks.

‘But I don’t have a son!’

‘Oh my god Josh, just cut the crap alright?’

‘Papa?’ A tiny voice says and Josh abruptly turns his head and feels like his whole world is crashing down when his eyes fall on a boy. A kid. This one is looking a him with a confused expression, eyes filled with fear. ‘Is dad okay?’

‘Of course he is, sweetie.’ This Tyler says while giving him a black look. ‘Of course he is, he’s just a bit tired okay? We’re going to prepare the breakfast alright? Let him have a bit more sleep so he can clear his mind.’

Josh is about to say something. He wants to defend himself, tell him that he’s never seen this boy before, that it feels to him like his life has been reinvented over the night, that he has no clue what’s happening to him, but then this boy, _Noah_ , walks towards him and kisses him on the cheek, and Josh just knows that the two people in front of him are either really good actors, or just completely genuine.

‘Okay.’ He says to himself, once they’re both gone. ‘Okay. Just… Be logical.’

He takes a deep breath and looks around him for a few seconds. There must be something. Anything. In this room. That could help him figure everything out. If this man claims to be his husband, then there has to be something in this room that proves his theory. Right? Josh gets up and his heart skips a beat when he sees a second nightstand on the right side of the bed. There’s a book on it. And a frame with a picture inside. It’s a photo of him and Tyler. Josh gets closer and takes it in his hand, biting his lower lip another time when he sees the wedding ring on his finger. He then lowers his eyes on his own hand and lets out a sigh of relief. There’s not a single ring on his finger.

‘What the fuck is going on?’ He says with a fragile voice. He takes a deep breath and opens his wardrobe, suddenly feeling a bit light-headed when he sees what’s inside. The right side of the closet is filled with clothes he doesn’t remember owning, and that he’s pretty sure doesn’t fit him anyway.

He looks around and rushed towards his own bedside table when his eyes fall on his cellphone. His cellphone. There must be something in there. There has to be. He unlocks it and his first instinct is to open his messages to send a text to his mom but as he’s about to do so, a name catches his attention. ‘ _Ty ♥_ ’. He doesn’t waste any second to click on the conversation and a bunch of messages instantly comes up on his screen.

‘Oh god oh god oh god’ He says to himself, feeling the panic boiling up in him. There are a hundred of texts in there and Josh just has to take a quick look on some of them to know that he definitely shares an intimate relationship with this Tyler.

‘ _I’m sorry for what I said earlier, J. I was tired and I didn’t mean any of it.’_

‘ _It’s all good. I said some things I definitely shouldn’t have said, too. Don’t worry about that, alright?’_

‘ _Okay.’_

‘ _I know you’re still overthinking, Ty. Just forget about the whole thing, okay? It was just a stupid argument. I love you. So much. I’m sorry I yelled at you.’_

‘ _I love you more.’_

‘ _Debatable.’_

Josh drops the phone on the bed and lets himself fall on the mattress. He almost feels bad for reading these texts. Because this isn’t his life. That’s for sure. This Josh Tyler was talking to in these messages. It wasn’t him. He slowly gets up and winces in pain when a violent headache hits his forehead. He still opens the bedroom’s door and takes a few steps in the kitchen. Tyler and Noah both look up at him but Josh chooses to ignore them and lets his eyes scan the main room instead. He then walks towards the second room and his heart only beats a bit faster against his chest. It’s not a random room anymore. It’s a bedroom. A kid’s bedroom. His exercise bike has been replaced by a small bed covered by stuffed animals.

Josh runs his hands through his hair a second time and suddenly feels like his trachea is blocked, cutting off his air flow. He tries to regain his breath but something is blocking his air access and Josh is suffocating. Tears start rolling down his cheeks and he knows that his so-called son might be scared to see him like this and he tries to hide himself as best as he can but he suddenly breaks down in tears and lets himself slide against the wall.

Josh can hear fragments of conversations. He can feel someone walking towards him but his vision is blurred by his tears and it’s only when a hand is being placed on his right shoulder that he suddenly comes back to his senses.

‘Josh. Hey Josh. Take a deep breath, alright? Can you do that for me?’

‘I’m sorry.’ Josh only says. ‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’

‘It’ alright.’ Tyler answers, slowly. ‘It’s alright?’ He adds. ‘Try to breathe, alright? There’s no rush. In…. And out.’ Josh closes his eyes and follows his advice, trying to focus on this voice rather than the situation he’s in. ‘In… And out.’ Tyler says again. ‘Alright. That’s great. One more time.’

‘Th-thanks.’ He says after a few seconds.

‘You should sit down.’ Tyler answers, guiding him towards their bedroom. Josh watches him close the door and takes a seat on the bed, rubbing his temples while Tyler carefully sits down next to him. ‘Listen, Josh I… What’s going on? Is it that same feeling again?’

‘What… What feeling?’

‘Same feeling as yesterday. You told me you were feeling dizzy. Wary, even. Remember? What’s wrong, sweetheart? You’re scaring me.’ He says, running one of his hands through his blue hair.

‘Please stop.’ Josh answers. ‘Please, just stop touching me, alright?’

‘Okay.’ Tyler simply says, pulling his hand back from Josh’s hair. ‘Okay.’

‘Listen I… I know it’s going to sound crazy and… And you’ll probably take me for… You’ll probably take me for a fucking lunatic but I… I’ve never been married, dude. We’re not married.’

‘Josh, what are you talking about, you’re… Is this a fucked up way for you to break up with me or something?’ Tyler adds, and his voice sounds so fragile Josh almost regrets saying these words.

‘No! Dude, no. I’m not saying… I’m not saying you’re not married. You definitely are. Just not to me. I… Look, I’m single, alright? My love life is basically nonexistent, trust me. And I’m not… I’m certainly not a father either, I… Dude I’m so not ready to be a dad. It’s so… It’s so many responsibilities and I can’t even take care of myself properly.’

‘Josh, you don’t make any sense.’

‘I know.’ Josh agrees, laughing nervously. ‘I know, I… Look at my finger.’ He eventually says, raising his hand towards him. ‘No ring. And my hair!’ He suddenly adds. ‘You were surprised to see that my hair was blue this morning.’

‘Yeah, it’s… It was black. Yesterday, it was black. But Josh, you’ve always been so spontaneous. So much more than me. For all I know, you could have decided to dye it during the night.’

‘Tyler, I’m probably the least spontaneous person you’ll ever meet.’

‘Then what are you saying? That you’re coming from a parallel universe or something?’ Tyler says, and that’s when it hits him. _Parallel universes_. The old book of his grandfather. The magic spell. I did that. He thinks. _All of this_. He thinks. _It’s on me._

‘Fuck.’ He only says. ‘Fuck.’

‘What? What’s going on?’

‘That’s… That’s exactly what I’m saying.’

‘Josh please, be serious for a second okay?’

‘But I am!’ Josh exclaims. ‘Tyler. I am.’

‘J, I know you’re obsessed with conspiracy theories and aliens shit but please. Just… Don’t bullshit me right now.’

‘I’m not. I swear to god I’m not. I… Listen to me, alright? If I’m in a parallel universe, then I pretty much have the same life as this Josh you’re talking about. You know my grandfather, right? The one who died a few months ago.’

‘Josh, nobody died a few months ago. I… I know that one of your grandfather is not in good shape but… Yeah.’

‘He’s… He’s still alive?’ Josh asks and some tears start rolling down his cheeks once again.

‘He… He is. The one who lives right outside the city, right?’

‘Yes! This one… He’s dead. In my… In my world, he’s dead. He passed away a few months ago, and I… I was at his place. Yesterday. I was helping my parents to sort everything out because they want to sell the house. It’s so big and nobody… Nobody’s going to have the time to deal with so much work anyway so we… We decided to sell it. Anyway, I was… I was filling these boxes. I was filling them and I… I just… There was this weird book, an old one. A book of spells or something like that, and I… I just read one about… About parallel universes…. I read it out loud.’

‘You did what?’

‘I… I didn’t know it was actually going to work dude, I…’

‘No I just… Wait a second. You’re telling me that you went to your grandfather’s house, that you picked this book of spells and just _decided_ to recite one of them out loud? What the fuck is wrong with you?’

‘Dude come on, how could I’ve known? I thought it was just a bunch of bullshit I…’

‘And I’m guessing that… I’m guessing that you have no idea how to go back there?’

‘I… I don’t. Sorry.’ Josh says, almost whispering.

‘And so… If you’re here. If any of this is true. Josh. The real Josh. _My Josh_. He must be in your world…. Right?’

‘I guess so. I just… I don’t know how it works dude.’ Josh answers, and he’s about to add something but then his eyes fall on Tyler and he can see this one is crying. Tears are rolling down his cheeks and Josh has no idea what he’s supposed to do. All of this is on him. He brought this on himself and the panic he still felt a few minutes ago is slowly being replaced by guilt. ‘I… I’m going to make this right, I… I prom-’

‘Shut up.’ Tyler says, running his hand through his hair. ‘Just shut up. I… You have no idea what you’ve just done, okay? Josh, the _real_ Josh he… He could feel it, okay? He was feeling weird. The whole day. He was feeling so weird, and paranoid and wary, and I… I just dismissed his feelings. I told him he was probably just feeling tired but I-’

‘Dude, you couldn’t know, alright? I’m sure he… I’m sure he doesn’t blame you.’

‘Of course he doesn’t and that’s not what I’m trying to say. He… He’s the most amazing father Noah could ever ask for, alright? And he’s… I know he’s having a hard time seeing that. He feels like I did all the hard work, he just… He’s convinced that Noah and I are a lot closer than they are and that’s bullshit. It really is. But now, he’s… He’s so far away from us and…. And he needs to come back, alright? You need to bring him back to me. You need to bring him back to us.’

‘I… I know.’

‘You need to fix this. And you need to do it fast.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really, really hope you still want to read this and that you liked it. I'm sorry I took so long again.
> 
> You can talk to me on Twitter if you want (@kyewopen)


	4. Chapter 4

Josh is still in Tyler’s house. This one has been nice enough to let him stay in the flat while he was driving his son to his parents. It’s a Saturday and there’s no school today but Josh is almost convinced that Tyler chose to keep his son away from him on purpose. And he doesn’t blame him, really, he probably would have done the same thing if he was in this situation.

He’s still seated on the couch and he hasn’t moved since the other boy left half an hour ago. He tries to stay calm, he tries to keep a cool head about the whole thing. After all, he’s the one who is responsible for everything that has happened for the past two hours. He’s the one who said these words out loud. He’s the one who managed to travel to a parallel universe. He didn’t mean to, that’s for sure, but he’s still the only one to blame. He runs both of his hands through his faded blue hair and takes a deep breathe. He gets up, sweeps the room he’s in with his eyes and walks around the house for a while. This is definitely the same flat. Some things have changed: the color of his toothbrush, the material of his silverware, the size of the pillows on the couch, the texture of his pillowcase. Details. Some details have changed now he takes the time to look around with a careful eye but overall? Overall, this flat is exactly the same as the one he used to live in and even though some people could tell him that it’s a good thing because it doesn’t break his habits, Josh is pretty sure that it only makes things worse.

On the contrary, he tries to remember every single detail that changed. He tries to focus on this toothbrush, this pillowcase, the silverware, anything that can prove him that he’s not loosing his head, anything that can assure him that this world isn’t his. There is a picture placed on a small table next to the sofa, a picture of Tyler with what he guesses is the other version of himself. They seem close. And Josh lets out a small laugh at how stupid he sounds right now. _Of course they’re close, dickhead, they’re married_. Another picture, a small one, is located right next to this one, except this time Noah is with them. This one is on Josh’s shoulders and Tyler is looking up at him with a huge smile on his face. _They’re cute_ , Josh thinks before making his way towards their bedroom. This one is still the same. He basically owns the same clothes, the same crazy amount of hats and beanies, the only thing that changed is the number of CDs placed on his desk. This Josh owns a lot more CDs than he does but he’s happy to see that they more or less have the same taste in music. He takes _The Black Parade_ in his hands and is about to turn around when he hears Tyler opening the front-door, certainly back from his parents’ place. Josh carefully puts the CD back where it belongs and joins him in the living-room. This one looks up at him and lets out a nervous laugh after a few seconds, earning a frown from Josh.

‘I just… I was hoping I had dreamed the whole thing but no… You still have the blue hair.’

‘Oh, huh… Yeah. Sorry about that.’ Josh says, biting his lower lip. He has no idea what he’s supposed to say in front of the other boy, how he’s supposed to act. His surroundings are very familiar and completely disorienting at the same time and Josh is lost. ‘I’m sure… I’m sure he’s fine, you know.’ He says and regrets saying these words as soon as Tyler looks up at him with a fake smile.

‘Oh right.’ Tyler says sarcastically. ‘Yeah I’m sure he’s doing just fine. Chilling.’

‘Look I’m sorry, alright, I- I don’t what I’m supposed to tell y-’

‘Then don’t.’ Tyler answers, cutting him off. ‘Don’t say anything.’ He adds. ‘Honestly, I need… I don’t even know what I need, okay?’ His voice is a bit louder than a few seconds ago. ‘It’s just… It’s a lot. Alright? Yesterday, I… I fell asleep next to my husband and this morning I just… I woke up with you _in my bed_ , what the fuck did you expect?’

‘I- I don’t… I don’t expect anything from you, man I just… I’m just as confused as you, trust me I have no idea how-’

‘Shut up.' Tyler cuts him off again. ‘Just shut up, alright? You did this. All of this? It’s on you. I just… I just want him back for christ’s sake.’ Tyler says, a few tears rolling down his cheeks once again and Josh just stays silent, standing awkwardly a few meters away from him. ‘I just want him back.’ This one still says after a few seconds.

‘I'm sorry.'

'For fuck's sake, stop saying you're sorry alright?' Tyler says, this time yelling. 

'Alright.' Josh answers, almost whispering. 'You’re right, okay? This whole situation sucks and I’m the one who was stupid enough to read this spell out loud.’

‘This is so... This is so freaking stupid. Do you at least realize how stupid this is?'

'I know I just...'

'But I... As stupid as it sounds, It’s actually the kind of stupid crap Josh would do, so…’ Tyler answers, letting out a small laugh. ‘I’m not very surprised.’ He adds. ‘And I just... For all I know I could have done the same.’

‘Yeah.'

‘It’s just a lot to take in, you know? I mean man you look exactly like him. Except for the blue hair obviously but… You’re a perfect copy of him and I just… I don’t know how I'm supposed to act around you. It's like I... I feel like I know you but I don't. You're a complete stranger. Except you're not because in a way you _are_ Josh. Just not the one I'm in love with. And I... I don't know I... Everything was fine and then I... Then I woke up with a weird alien doppelganger of my own husband in my own bed. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to tell Noah.’

‘I could always… I don’t know I could always pretend to be the real Josh, you know, if you don’t want him to be confused or-’

‘Absolutely not. I just… It would be so… So morbid, in a way. And he’s… He’s smart you know. He would figure out you’re not his real father. He’s a kid but he’s not stupid.’

‘How old is he?’ Josh asks, noticing that talking about his family seems to reassure him.

‘5.'

'When did you adopt him?'

'Huh... Six months ago. It was… It wasn’t very easy but… But we made it work, you know. His mom died while giving birth to him and his father… His real father is out of the picture. For all I know he was an abusive asshole so I just… We wanted him to be safe. We wanted him to _feel_ safe. When we brought him home six months ago, he was… He was so shy. He wouldn’t say a word. But I don’t know I guess with time he started to… He started to open up a bit. And even now it’s so far from being perfect, there are still times when we… When Josh and I have trouble to… To reach him. But things are better…. Fuck I don’t even know why I’m telling you all this, I don’t even.... I don't even know you. God, I don’t know a single thing about you, do I?’

‘I think you do. I’m pretty sure I basically have the same life as your husband, you know?’

‘Yeah.’ Tyler only says. ‘Yeah, maybe you're right... What are you going to do then?'

'I have no idea.' Josh admits.

'You... You’ll probably have to take the reins of his life while you’re here, right? Josh loves his job so please... Please pretend while you're here. You can… You can even crash here if you want. Until we figure out a solution.’

‘We?’ Josh asks, confused. ‘You’re going to help me?’

‘Of course I’m going to help you. No offense but I really can’t wait for you to go the fuck back where you belong.’

Josh lets out a small laugh and lets his eyes wander around the room again. He doesn’t really know why, because clearly this room looks just like the one in his own flat but a part of him can’t help but to feel completely disoriented and lost. His eyes eventually fall back on Tyler and this one took the picture of him and Josh in his hands and is looking at his husband with a small smile on his face.

‘I just… He must be completely lost… He must be so scared and confused and I… I hate myself for not being able to do the slightest thing to help him you know. He’s alone and I… Christ.’

‘What’s he like?’

‘Josh?’

‘Yeah. Your husband. What’s he like? Tell me about him.’

‘Why do you want to know about him?’

‘As you said. If I’m about to take the reins of his own life, I guess I should know about him. His personality, his habits, his hobbies, his past. Anything.’ Josh says.

‘Well he’s...’ And Josh just knows that this man must mean a great deal to him because a small smile has already made it to his face and he’s even pretty sure that this one is blushing a bit. ‘He’s kind. And I know what you’re going to say. It's always the term you use to describe someone who’s like… Irrelevant. Mundane. But he’s just… He’s the kindest person I’ve ever met. He’s always… He’s always so full of joy. Always smiling. He’s… He just radiates warmth and trust and I just… I don’t know. I’m so in love with him.’

‘Well I can definitely see that.’ Josh says. ‘How did you two meet?’

‘He was working in this cafe a few years ago and...’

‘Wait. He was?’

‘Yeah. He got tired of it after a while so now he’s working in this music store thanks to his best-friend.’

‘Is the best-friend called Brendon?’

‘Yeah. Yeah Brendon Urie. You know him?’

‘Fuck. He’s my best-friend, too.' Josh says with a small smile. _At least Brendon is still here._ He thinks. 'He works in this music store but I… In my world, I’m still working in this cafe.’

‘Well I guess you’ll have to get used to a completely different job then.’

‘God, this is bad.’ Josh only says, his heart beating faster and faster against his chest. ‘This is so bad, I… I need to get back to my world. I just… I can’t, I’m… I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I ruined everything.’

‘Hey just… Just breathe, alright? We’re going to figure something out. We will.’

‘Keep talking to me about your Josh… Tell me how you meet, or… Anything. Please. Otherwise I’m pretty sure I’m going to freak out and have a panic attack.’

‘Well...As I said. He was a barista in this cafe and first time I went there, it was with a friend of mine and I… I don’t know. I didn’t think anything of him at first but the cafe was close to where I used to work and I’m a huge coffee drinker so I kept coming back to this place. I won’t lie, with time a part of me kinda hoped he would engage the conversation cause I thought he was cute and I was definitely too shy to make the first move. And one day he did. We talked for a while and each time a bit more, and he just…. He eventually asked me out. And I said yes. That’s it.’

‘When did you two get married? Did he propose to you?’

‘No I did. We moved in together a year and a half ago and we got married last year.’

‘And Noah?’

‘What about him?’

‘When did he get in the picture?’

‘We talked about adoption before getting married and we… It didn’t take such a long time to adopt Noah, as unusual as it is. Especially for gay couples. I’m guessing it’s the same in your world?’

‘Yeah, definitely. Homophobic assholes are everywhere man. Not only in your world, I’m sorry about that.’

‘What about you?’

‘What about me?’

‘Do you have someone in your life?’

‘Oh no. I’m single. I… I don’t really trust people. And honestly I’m so bad at social interactions I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t even notice if someone was flirting with me.’

‘You sound just like me.’ Tyler says with a smile and Josh lets out a small laugh.

For a while, neither of them say anything. Josh can see Tyler is still reminiscing his past and he himself is focused on the current situation. Because he knows this one counts on him to find a way to get back to his universe but the truth is: He has no idea on how to do that. He’s not even sure if there was something in his book that explained how to go back to where you came from, something that explained how to reverse the trend. And even if there was. Even if the reversed spell is written in the same book, Josh is not even sure if he can find it in this universe. Maybe this book doesn’t exist in this universe. Maybe his grandfather is a completely different person. Maybe he never owned this book.

‘I’m scared.’ Tyler eventually says.

‘I’m scared too.’

‘I’m terrified. I just… I’m so scared for him. I know him and he… He has very bad anxiety sometimes and he wasn’t… He wasn’t feeling very well lately with Noah. He kept saying he was a bad father. Or at least, that I was better at this whole parenthood thing. Which is bullshit. But I know it was… It was really weighing on him, you know. I hope someone is here to help him.’

‘I’m convinced Brendon is, dude.’

‘How can you be so sure?’

‘We’re basically seeing each other everyday, Brendon and I. He’s always passing by the cafe to get a coffee or something. They’ll bump into each other, that’s for sure.’

‘Yeah but… He doesn’t even know he’s still working in this café in this world.’

‘That means he’s definitely going to go to this music store at some point, right?’

‘Yeah. Yeah you’re probably right.’

‘And then he’ll meet Brendon. And let me just say that my best-friend has enough imagination to believe this shit.’

‘Yeah. That sounds like the Brendon I know too.’

‘I’ll bring him back. I promise.’

Tyler only nods and as he’s staring into space, Josh just knows that this one isn’t convinced. And how can he be? Josh himself is scared of being stuck here forever without finding a way to get back to his own world, to his own surroundings. And as terrified as he might be, he knows he cannot even begin to imagine what it must be like for this other Josh. Because he’s not married. He doesn’t have a son. He’s alone. He has his family of course but he knows that his parents and brother and sisters are still here, in a way. In this world, they exist. In this world, his family is still his family, or at least he certainly hopes they are. But waking up alone in a flat you normally share with your husband and your kid, waking up in a world in which you’re not even sure these two people even exist, it must be terrifying.

‘Okay, I might have an idea.’ Josh still says after a few seconds.

‘I’m listening.’ Tyler instantly says.

‘Alright so… It’s easy, really. Maybe it’s too easy, even. But I… I guess It’s worth a shot. You know how I found this book in my grandfather’s house, right?’

‘Yeah. Yeah you told me.’

‘Right. Is the grandfather you know obsessed with everything related to which-craft?’

‘He used to be. Josh told me some stories about it but I think… He doesn’t really care anymore.’

‘Alright. I was just… I was just thinking. Maybe this book is still in my grandfather’s house. In _Josh_ ’s grandfather’s house, I mean. And I… I’m not certain but I think something was written in there on how to…’

‘How to come back to your world?’

‘Yeah.’

‘So all we would need to do is to go back to Josh’s grandfather’s house, find this book and reverse the spell. Right?’

‘Right. But I just… Don’t get your hopes up, man. For all I know maybe this book doesn’t even exist in your world. I don’t know.’

‘Yeah but maybe it does.’ Tyler says. ‘Look, it’s… It all seems too easy I agree but… I’m lost. I have no idea what to do. I have no idea where to start. And it’s the only thing I can think of right now so… It’s worth a shot. I know his grandfather is with Josh’s parents today but… We’re going there first thing in the morning.’

‘What about your son?’

‘What about him?’

‘What do you want to tell him?’

‘I… I have no idea.’ Tyler admits, running his two hands through his hair. ‘I… You can crash on the couch tonight if you want, and… I’ll sleep at my parents’ with Noah.’

‘Thank you.’ Josh says. ‘I mean it, man, I… Thank you for being so understanding I just… I can’t even begin to imagine how it must be like for you and yet you’re still so… Thank you.’

‘Don’t thank me yet.’ Tyler answers. ‘I’m not doing it for you.’ He adds. ‘I’m doing it for him.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm anxious and insecure pleasetellmeyoustilllikethis


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm??? Back??

It’s been three days since Josh is stuck in this fake but somewhat realistic universe. Three days and still no sign of his husband. No sign of his child. And god did he try to get back to them. He tried everything. Everything he could think of. He spent hours on the Internet trying to find something, anything that could help him begin to comprehend what was happening to him. He spent hours examining every single links coming up on the Google search results. Because that's how it's supposed to work. Google is supposed to have the solution to everything. Google is supposed to have the answer to any question you might ask yourself. But in this specific case, googling _I’m stuck in a parallel universe and I don’t know how to get back to mine_ hasn’t been really helpful. Quite the contrary.

He did find solutions. Lots of them. Coming from weird forums and discussions groups mostly, but Josh was desperate to try everything, whether it be reciting spells, creating a giant circle on his kitchen floor with all the salt he had in his possession, or even spending hours in his room to try and find some object that could act like a portkey. Every crazy little thing. He tried them all. All for nothing. Brendon himself even seemed to have given up and Josh was terrified. He couldn’t lose the support of his own best-friend. He was the only person making him feel like he wasn’t losing his mind. He was the only person keeping him from going mad. 

“You’re not crazy.” He tells himself. “You’re going to figure this out and find your way back to them.”

It isn’t the first time Josh is talking to himself in front of his bathroom’s mirror. He has to. It’s the only thing he found to keep himself sane. To convince himself that he’s not inventing things. That he can’t possibly have made up five years of his life, just like that. It can’t be. Because then the reality would be too much to handle. What if it was nothing but a dream? What if everything was just a product of his imagination? What if Tyler and Noah never actually existed? What if he was going crazy?

Josh closes his eyes with all the strength he has and shakes his head. Doubting himself isn’t the solution. Doubt only leads to fear and fear is the last thing he needs at the moment. Giving in to panic would only make things worse. And he needs to stay sane. He needs to stay focused. And so he thinks. He sits down on the corner of the bedroom and thinks. He thinks and thinks and thinks until an idea starts to emerge in his head. That’s when he calls Brendon.

“Hey Josh. How are you holding up?” Is the first thing his best friend says to him. “Listen I thought of something and I can’t promise you it will work but I guess it’s worth the sho-”

“What if he’s here?” Josh cuts him off, standing up on his feet.

“What do you mean?” His friend asks, confused.

‘What if he’s here too?” Josh repeats. “What if they’re both here?”

“Who are you talking about, dude? What if who’s here?”

“Tyler.’ Josh only answers. “Tyler and Noah. What if they’re here? We’ve been looking for so many ways to get back to them but what if they’re both here? What if they woke up in this world too and try to find _their_ way back to _me_?”

“Josh, I… It seems unlikely.”

“Brendon, this whole thing seems unlikely and yet I’m still stuck in this parallel universe without my husband and my own kid.”

“Okay.” His best-friend says. “Okay. Let’s say it’s true, let’s say they woke up in this universe too, then why didn’t they wake up in your house?”

“I don’t know.” Josh admits. “I don’t know, Bren, but… It’s worth a shot, right?”

“I guess. Give me half an hour, I’m coming.”

Josh hangs up and splashes some water on his face before taking a deep breathe and making his way towards the living-room where he takes a seat on the sofa, sofa he moved a few inches to the left a few days ago cause Tyler’s maniac remarks couldn’t leave his mind. He takes his computer and starts typing his own name.

_Joshua Dun_

Maybe there will be something, out there, that will help him figure out a bit more about his life. And maybe figuring out a bit more about his life will help him to try and find a way to get back to his universe. But all he can find is an old record in the university he graduated in and his facebook profile. He clicks on the “about” tab and his throat only tightens a bit more when his relationship status reads “single”. Not that he’s ever been very active on social media, but getting yet another proof of his single life only makes him a bit more scared than he already is. He then goes on his profile and all he can see is a few youtube videos of songs he likes and a NASA article dated November the 26th. Nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing he wouldn’t be posting himself.

He then clicks on the search bar and types another name. _Tyler Joseph_. Unfortunately for him, Tyler Joseph isn’t a rare name and Josh only lets out a small sigh when his eyes fall on all the existing accounts on the social media. He scrolls down through all of them and he’s pretty sure his heart skips a beat when he finally recognizes the face he already misses terribly. He quickly clicks on the account but this one is private and the profile picture is the only thing he can see. But that's enough to make him hopeful again. Because his husband does exist. His husband is real and this thought is enough to put the biggest smile on his face. He may have no friends in common with him on this social media but he’s _out there_ and he's  _real_. Josh takes yet another deep breathe and runs both of his hands through his hair, trying to stay reasonable.

His front door is suddenly being wide opened and Josh quickly looks up at his friend who only gives him a small smile, letting himself fall on the couch next to him.

“Look.” Josh says, turning his computer towards him.

“You found him.” Brendon notices.

“I did.” Josh says, his smile still so big.

‘Josh… You do know that he probably has nothing to do with your husband, right?”

“Brendon, it’s him. I’ve been married to this guy for about a year, I could recognize him in a sea of a million people.”

“Look, I… Josh, listen to me. I get that you’re desperate. And confused. And scared. I get that, okay? But this dude? It’s not your husband. He looks like him, just like I look like your friend Brendon. He may be a perfect copy of the Tyler you know but he’s not your husband. The same way that I am not your actual friend.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“You’re not friend with him, Josh. You literally have no friends in common with him.”

“Because it’s not my real phone.” Josh says back to him. “Brendon, I know it’s him. I just _know_. Trust me.”

“Okay...” His friend gives in, and even if Josh can hear this one is still not convinced, he chooses to ignore it and focuses on his computer again. “What’s his job?”

“Tyler’s? He’s a teacher. At the Worthington primary school”

“Okay.” Brendon answers, placing his friend’s computer on his knees. Josh watches him as he types “ _Tyler Joseph teacher Worthington primary school_ ” and observes closely the results coming up on the screen. It immediately redirects them to the official website of the school with a picture of his husband and Josh could cry just looking at him. Because he's seen this picture before. He can swear it. It is the exact same picture used in his own universe. This means his husband is right there, ten minutes away from his flat. He's been there the whole time. 

“Josh please don’t get your hopes up. This doesn’t mean anything.”

“What do you mean, it doesn’t mean anything, Brendon?” Josh says, getting angry. “He’s right there.” He adds, pointing at the screen.

“It doesn’t _mean_ anything. For all we know, this Tyler Joseph can also be a teacher at Worthington school.”

“Yeah, what a fucking coincidence.” Josh says, ironically.

“Josh, look around you for christ’s sake.” Brendon answers with a loud voice. “Look around you! You told me yourself. Your flat looks just the same. You still have the same neighbors. Your family’s still the same. I’m still your best-friend. I still work in this music store. You still have the same tattoos. Just _think about it_. There are so many similarities between this world and yours. Tyler Joseph just happens to be one of them.”

“Brendon, he’s _real_. My husband is here, he’s working _right now_ in this school and you expect me to just _let go_? I can’t, Bren. I just can’t, okay? I need it to be true. I just… I need it to be true.” Josh repeats, feeling his eyes filled with tears. “I need it to be true.” He adds, almost whispering.

“Josh if this was true, Tyler would already have tried to go back here.” His friend says with a low voice. “He didn’t.”

“Brendon, please. Please.”

His friend doesn’t say anything and Josh starts crying. Because he knows, deep down, he knows that he makes no sense. He knows he is so desperate that he would believe anything. He knows that his friend is probably right, that this Tyler he can see online is nothing but a pale copy of his husband. But he can’t stop himself from hoping, he can’t stop himself from thinking that there is a possibility that Tyler is only waiting for him in this school. He can’t stop himself from hoping that everything can go back in order, that he can get his old life back. But he doesn’t have the time to say anything that his best-friend speaks again.

“Okay.” He says. “Okay.” He repeats. “Come with me.”

“Where are we going?” Josh asks, watching his best-friend making his way to the front door.

“You want to see him, right?”

“I do. So fucking much.”

“Then, come on.” Brendon repeats. “It’s 3:30. Classes should be almost done.”

For a few seconds, Josh does nothing. He does nothing and just stares at his best friend in the eye, saying nothing.

“Come on.” Brendon says, opening the door. He waits for him in the doorway and Josh nods, taking his coat and following him in the staircase. He goes down the stairs and tries to ignore his heartbeats pounding harder and harder against his chest as he gets closer and closer to this school, tries to ignore the tremors of his hands and the dryness of his throat when he can hear the bell rings, letting everyone know classes are done for the day. Josh stays there with a lump in his throat, looking carefully at every single person crossing the courtyard. It’s mostly kids, running to their parents. Others waiting for them near the school. Teachers making their way back to their cars, their flats, their houses. So many people come and go and Josh is afraid he might miss his husband but then someone catches his attention. A kid. Josh opens his eyes wide, his mouth agape, staring in shock at the small boy making his way outside the main building.

“Noah.” Josh only says, his eyes filled with tears. “Noah.” He repeats.

And he is not alone. He’s holding someone’s hand and when Josh’s eyes fall on the man walking alongside his son, the biggest smile appears on his face. Tyler. His own husband and his kid are walking towards him and Josh suddenly loses all sense of rationality and rushes to them, ignoring the voice of his best-friend telling him to be careful.

“Tyler.” Josh only says, almost whispering, before repeating the same name, louder. “Tyler.”

And then Tyler looks up at him and Josh only cries a bit more.

“Oh my god Tyler, I looked everywhere for you.” He says, wiping his tears with the sleeve of his coat.

“Do… Do I know you?” Tyler asks, confused.

Josh looks at him in shock, his heart pounding harder against his chest.

“I… Tyler it’s me. Josh.”

“Okay Josh.” Tyler only answers, letting out a small laugh. “I think you got mistaken.”

“Who is he, daddy?” Noah asks with a small voice.

“Noah sweetheart, it’s Dad.” Josh only says, opening his arms wide so his son can give him a hug. But his kid only takes a step back and hides behind Tyler’s legs.

“Alright dude, I think you should go, okay?” Tyler says, placing one of his hands on Noah’s hair and turning around, leaving Josh alone in the middle of this square.

“Tyler wait. Please.” He begs him and is about to run after him but what he sees makes him stop dead in his track. Because Tyler is walking towards a woman. A blonde girl. He’s walking towards her with a small smile on his face and slowly places a hand behind his neck to kiss her. And Josh’s voice dies in his throat and his heart breaks.

He want to yell so hard. He wants to scream at him and begs him to come back. He wants to run towards them and asks her to go the fuck away and to leave them alone. But he does nothing. He stays immobile, unable to say anything, unable to do the smallest gesture. Because his own husband doesn’t recognize him. His own son doesn’t recognize him. He is a complete stranger to the both of them and he feels like his heart is being ripped apart into a million pieces. He feels like his heart is being stomped over a million times. He feels like his whole world is crashing down right in front of him another time and his legs suddenly no longer support him. Josh falls on his knees and lets his tears run free.

“He’s my son.” He whispers, sobbing. “He’s my son.” He repeats, a bit louder and he can see Tyler looking back at him, confused. This one observes him for a while but turns his back on him a few seconds later, moving away from him, Noah’s hand in his.

“Josh.” Brendon says next to him but Josh doesn’t hear him. He can feel someone trying to support him, he can feel someone trying to hold him up, he can hear someone talking to him but he doesn’t hear anything. Everything around him is a blur. He doesn’t see the people watching him with confused looks on their faces. He doesn’t see the kids pointing at him to their parents. He can only see the look of confusion and distrust on Tyler’s face.

His own family has been stolen away from him, right in front of his eyes.

His own life has been ripped away from him.

“He’s my son.” He repeats another time. “He’s my son. He’s my son. He’s my son.”

“Josh.” Brendon repeats. “Josh, get up.”

Josh is sobbing next to his best-friend, running his hands through his hair over and over again. His eyes are closed and his lips shake.

“Josh.” His friend repeats, once again. “Josh, we’re going to find them, okay? We’re going to find them. I promise you.”

“They were right there, Brendon!” He suddenly says. “They were right there and he acted like I was no one.” He adds, in-between sobs. “He acted like I was no one.”

“Because he doesn’t know you, Josh.” Brendon says. “He doesn’t know you. This isn’t the Tyler Joseph you’re in love with. This isn’t the Noah you adopted and raised. You need to remember this. You need to remember this, okay?”

“I want to go back.” Josh only answers, his sobs getting louder. “I need to go back. God I need to go back. Please let me go back.” He says, to no one in particular. “What if I can’t go back?”

“You will.”

“How can you be so sure?” Josh says, staring in to space, in the direction where Tyler and Noah disappeared of his field of vision of few minutes ago.

“Because you need to."

“I don’t want to have to live in a world where I’m a stranger to the both of them.”

‘I know. And you won’t.” Brendon says.

And Josh cries a bit more.

Somewhere in a parallel universe, a dark brown haired boy cries with him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for not giving up on this fic. Hope you liked it. I'm sorry It's not so great but I'm slowly getting back to writing so I guess it will have to do.
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated :)


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